Editor

Gutteral Howl is an english actor and comedian born in 1971 at yorkshire pitminers hospital
in later life he went on to become the king of france during which time he reformed the french workers union to include shouting at inanimate objects

today he resides in the forest with an ever expanding tribe of hunter gathererer pseudo-neandertal project managers, each of them constantly vying for the position of beta-male

paleontologists studying the tribe report an increase in renumeration to the alpha group of the tribe and an increase in scat play among all members

amongst the tribe's beliefs is the belief that beliefs bely other more interesting beliefs and also that being a prick is a worthwhile way to live one's life

the tribe and their leader are known among the forest animals for their hatred of everything

GH edits the 1781 Private News Agency from the inside

you can contact Howl's asshole tribe by sending an angry email to editor@the1781privatenewsagency.com where replies are sent out each solstice.

Sub-Editor

jenirince lawnchair joined the team and joined the team during a tea break in the dead of night

lights, camera, sip. born into frivolity to a life of daily swim team competition meets jenirince learned to write at the age of nineteen and has since published for the new york graffiti tag team [illegible scribble]. bearing the weight of an over-conditioned index finger led to literary acclaim. many words containing extra yuhjnm.

currently residing in a plastic container lined with marmite in the mountains of wd40 jenirince lawnchair scrapes daily and is monster.

Submarine-Editor

cloon georgy is editor in chief of of of of of of of of of of of of of of

with over a decade of experience in editing cloon is a known tour de france in magazine whatever

residing in manmilliner on the 14th floor let's be honest it's the 13th superstition stevie wonder why they bother cloon is

sucked into celluloid on wonders of oh bro where art my car dude and oceansoceansoceansoceansoceansoceansoceansoceansoceansoceansoceans and have some coffee you too you would expect a prize, a trophy, article in local paper cut out by mother

this is cloon, always sincere

Sub-par-Editor

earning such accolades as most likely to and best supporting and continuously, mogan spock has been changing words into other words since time immoral.

solla ruoles emit o' yeah yeah proper journalism with a loud sucking sound when confronted by poetry and verse and prose make the contribution of untold scale and immeasurable brilliance.

inhabiting a dimmention somewhere between kerning and ligature mogan has an affinity for enthuiasm and bare knuckle boxing in fields far from the city, something she calls childhood.

mogan drinks food chews water is known to fake a limp.

Arts correspondent

bovid oviscud started writing about music and the arts when it was almost of age. given the time.

enlarging it's influence to encompass all the animals at the safari park bovid read album sleeves to the animals and the keepers before and after each performance of the album.

bovid later set the animals free and followed them into the wild where it's influence grew to the wild animals and where it is rumoured to die with the animals raised in captivity.

prosecuted and once again living in captivity bovid contributes to the 1781 Private News Agency out of a love for ragtime and mash-hand. exploitation of the midset keeps it real.

bovid lives alone. very alone. the isolation is killing it.

Arts & Survey Respondent

flinlasity edenson writes prose and peeotry that isn't like my opinion it is actually what she does. To be clear i am not claiming that what she writes is "poetry" or "prose" but that it actually is that.

if you have ever even been inside a water you will know what it is to be wet and that is the essence of flinlasity. to be drowning in pentameters and the like. I don't really get it mysef, but some people seem to think nevermind what some people think. nevermind what i think, this was meant to be about flinlasity.

taking the bus instead of walking is flinlastity's excuse for always being late. never doubt, always donut, never question the probity of such stylish youth.

flinlastity cannot be said to live anywhere, she inhabits her prose wherever that may be even if it is in reject pile of 37 publishers before it lands here, on the desk of Gutteral Howl, a desk made from a tree felled with spoons and varnished in rainwater

every one of us is a little in love with flinlastity, though she scorns us all.

Political car-respondent.

Finicular Mousewheel graduated from Uviversiti of Swump with a Masters of the Universe in Political Silence.

Having worked in fast food chains as a person that stands there at the cash desk doing those things but unable to find gainful employement in her chosen field due to a particularly impoverished background, Finicular started her own political Party: The In-Labour Party.

Whilst the Party's enourmous faiure can be blamed on only having members who are giving birth to a baby, only to be ejected from the party at the moment the umbilical cord is severed, Finicular nevertheless became an MP for Upper Severe Counrtyside District in one of the prior Junes.

Living in a small car manufactured by a Japanese company and due to the intense travel from one politic to another politic Finicular has been inflicted by a worn inhibition.

Political Sheditor

stamp ridgebatter lives in a shed the same shed we keep the dolphinin in.
in keeping with his politics stamp earns a wage in keeping with his ideals in keeping with what a Dickensian pauper would have earned. he dresses that way too. I mean, we have asked him to come out of the shed, but then he comes out of the shed and frankly every one of us is embarassed in one way or another so we sort of, I ought not admint it really, but we hint that maybe he shoud get back in the shed. Then some time passes and we forget what it was like and we ask hime to come out of the shed again.

ridgbatter lives in our shed with a swimmammal.

Music & War Horrorspondent

kimothy pamjamin writes about music and war, sometimes war, sometimes music.
kimothy likes to talk about talk about pop music. people shooting at people saddens kimothy but he is soon cheered by the sound of a djembe, a sitar or a woman singing about sadness as his mother often did. kimothy has almost died in war zones many times but always lives to tell the tale much to the chagrin of his girlfreind who hasn't the nerve to break up with kimothy.
kimothy lives inside a plate of halibut that, he says, is the only place he can not feel cold.

the 1781 Private News Agency

Editorial Staff